The Nine Read online

  My shoulders slumped. I felt utterly defeated, but I refused to take the cigarette out of my mouth. “Well, at least I don’t have to worry about getting cancer.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Alex left the road and wheeled the Jeep through heavy brush, uprooting bushes and crawling over rocks and downed trees.

  “Are we headed for the South American jungle?” I reached up and grabbed hold of the roll bar on my right, so I didn’t slam my head into the side window—again. “My kidneys won’t take much more of this. Why didn’t we just zap straight to wherever we’re going instead of driving this giant cinder-block?”

  A grin that stretched from ear to ear had grown on Alex’s face. She jerked the wheel—or the wheel jerked her, I wasn’t sure which—and the Jeep dropped into a cavernous hole, then rocketed out again on its oversized tires and springs. “Stop complaining. This is fun. We can’t transport anywhere we want to go. We have to use a Splice. An Envisage Splice is a place that’s been set up as drop point for Judas agents. It’s the only way a Woebegone can get here. Not exactly a well-publicized bit of trivia either, for obvious reasons.”

  “Are you telling me someone added an en-div-ez ... one of those travel things in the middle of a pig farm on purpose?”

  Alex shrugged and squeezed the wheel, making a bright tattoo of Animal, from the Muppets, ripple over the muscles in her arm. “Don’t hurt yourself. Just call them Splices. All the Splices are set in places where we are less likely to be spotted making an entry Topside.”

  “Are all the Splices at pig farms?”

  “Only the nicer ones.”

  We broke through another stand of trees, and Alex slammed on the brakes so hard my seatbelt threatened to cut me into triangular pieces.

  “We’re here.” She sang the words in an excited high-pitched jingle.

  The Jeep’s headlights played along a sheer rock face that stretched so high it blocked the moon, causing anything farther than the Jeep’s lights to blend into a black mass of nothing.

  Alex shut off the engine—and our headlights—plunging even the area in front of us into darkness. When we opened the doors, the ignition ding seemed almost deafening in the relative stillness of the outdoors. As soon as the doors were closed, I felt like I had to whisper.

  Alex had no such compulsion. “Hurry up. I’m not waiting all day.” She, and her ear shattering voice, hiked along the rock face, her hand playing along the jagged wall. She seemed to be searching for something, although I didn’t know what.

  “Do you need some help?” I whispered, unable to help myself. “If we both look, maybe we can find whatever you’re looking for a little faster.”

  Alex peered at me in the dark. “Why are you whispering?” Her voice came out as a loud hiss that could in no way be considered a whisper. “There’s no one around for thirty miles.”

  I forced a normal voice but still couldn’t bring it up to full volume. “I said, if you’re looking for something, four eyes are better than two.”

  Alex smiled. “Thanks, but I found what we’re looking for.”

  She jerked at a bush, making the thin branches groan and snap. The narrow root gave way, and the whole thing pulled free.

  “Voila!” Alex held out her hands to display a small opening at the base of the wall.

  “A cave?”

  “A cave. And you’re going first. I hate spiders, and bats, and snakes, and centipedes, and earwigs, and roaches, and pretty much anything you are going to find inside of a cave.”

  I let out a little chuckle and got down on all fours. “So, the fearless wonder isn’t so fearless after all.”

  “Don’t let it go to your head. If we spot a bat in there, I may run, and I’ll climb right through you to get away if I need too. Now hurry up. It is going to get light soon, and I don’t want to be stuck out here when the sun comes up. We need to be back to the farm before anyone wakes up.”

  “What happened to being a big, bad Judas agent?”

  Alex glared at me. “There’s a difference between being scared of Mr. Johnson’s shotgun and being smart enough to want an uncomplicated exit. Now move.”

  I crouched and peered into the darkness before she noticed the smirk on my face. The opening was just big enough to squeeze my shoulders through if I worked my way in with my arms above my head. I wasn’t claustrophobic, per se, but the idea of being stuffed into a tiny hole underneath a million tons of rock turned out to be discomforting, even for a Woebegone.

  I stretched out my arms and dove into the darkness before I thought about it anymore. That’s when I learned how dark, dark could be. The limited amount of light emanating from the opening disappeared the moment my body filled the hole. My hands fumbled and scraped across the jagged rock, searching for any sort of purchase. I used my toes to push myself along, as I wiggled my shoulders through the ever-tightening space. I pushed forward again and took a breath. My chest wouldn’t expand to breathe. The area was too tight. I tried to back out, but something got stuck. My pants caught on a jagged piece of rock. There was nowhere to go. I tried to take in a breath again, but cold stone crushed my ribs and would not give. Panic crept in and tightened its grip. I wiggled and shook, flexing my muscles, making the opening feel even tighter. Something pushed at my feet, and I tried to relax. Alex was still behind me. The reminder grounded me to reality. I couldn’t back out, so I used her as leverage to move forward, blowing out what remained of my air in a last-ditch effort to push through. My hands found an opening, so I pulled with everything I had. If there had been a drop off waiting for me inside, I would have summersaulted right into the abyss.

  I emerged into more pitch darkness. The sense that I stood in the midst of a thousand teeming cave monsters became almost palpable. I extended a tentative hand and probed my surroundings. Nothing. No walls, no rocks, no monsters. Now my feet felt like they were perched on a three-foot precipice overlooking a bottomless black pit. Vertigo set in making me want to crouch to keep my balance.

  I concentrated on my breathing. The cool air was stale and damp, and smelled of minerals, moss, and rich soil. It felt almost like being on another planet. I didn’t know how Alex planned to see in here, but if she came in behind me and switched on a flashlight after sending me into the dark, it would serve her right to come through that tunnel with her silky blue hair full of over-friendly cockroaches and stinkbugs.

  “Wow, it’s dark in here.” Alex bumped into me, and I realized I still hadn’t moved more than two feet from the cave entrance.

  “Wait for a few minutes,” I said. “Your eyes won’t adjust—at all.”

  Something flared to life in front of my face and threatened to burn out my retinas. The brightness did not come from flashlight, but my eyes were too busy screaming to make out the source. A few seconds later, something yellow flickered and began to take shape. Fire. Alex’s tattooed hand held a molten softball-sized sphere of fire. Not a torch or a flair. Just ... fire revolved in her palm.

  “Better?” she asked.

  My eyes continued to adjust, but I had a hard time believing what I saw.

  “How are you doing that?”

  “Lesson number three hundred and forty-six.” She hefted the fiery ball into the air over her head. “Woebegone can develop a power when we spend enough time Topside. That’s part of the reason these little trips are so rare. Management doesn’t want a bunch of super-Woebegone running amok in The Nine. It’d be messy. Mine is the ability to manifest fire. It’s not something you get to pick, it just happens. And no, I have no idea what yours will be, so don’t ask.”

  “That is incredible.” I bit my tongue and tried not to look over eager, but then couldn’t help myself. “So, you have no way of knowing what I might manifest?”

  Alex sighed and turned away. “No, but I’m sure your power will be annoying. They usually have something to do with your past life. That’s all I can tell you.” She kept her flaming hand in the air and lit the cavern around us as we walked. Most of the time
, the cave had more than enough room to move around and stand up in. We passed several box-like formations on the walls and ceilings and saw beautiful sparkling caverns I knew nothing about. I wagered any spelunker would give his left gas light to discover this place.

  We descended through the maze for what felt like an hour, then Alex stopped and peered through a small opening. Unlike the rest of the cave, this area looked loose and somewhat disturbed. As if the rocks had caved in or been uncovered.

  “We need to go in there.” Alex pointed into the tight dark expanse beyond the opening.

  “How do you know all of this?”

  “I just know, okay? The lessons are getting a little tiring today. Let’s leave it at that for now.”

  Alex tried to clear some of the loose debris from around the opening with one hand while holding the flame up in the air with the other.

  “Here,” I said. “Let me do it.”

  Alex moved back, and I made short work of the rest. The hole was small, but the opening looked like a gaping gorge compared to the pinhole we had wiggled through at the beginning.

  Alex’s torch hand put off enough light for me to peer inside. A ledge hung about six feet below the opening, and after that, nothing. A sheer drop all the way to Wonderland.

  “I’m not sure what we’re supposed to do,” I said. “But unless I manifest the power of flight in the next few seconds, we’re in the wrong place.”

  Alex leaned in and looked through the opening as well. “What we need is just inside. Lower yourself down to the ledge and collect a sample of the guano.”

  “Guano?” I arched an eyebrow. “Like poop? We’re Agency pooper scoopers?”

  “Just get in there. I’ll hold the light.”

  Alex drew out a sample tube from her pocket and handed it to me. “Here. Collect the guano in this.”

  I took the little ampule and shoved it into the pocket of my slicker. “Why are we doing this? Who wants a bunch a poop from a cave?”

  “Don’t worry about who wants it or for what. Worry about the fact that we’re here to do a job. You may also want to think about the fact that an annoying person might be left to wander these caves in the dark forever.”

  “Not forever,” I said. “Sooner or later I would die and crawl out of the Gnashing Fields. When I got my memories back, I’d show up on your doorstep with a whole new batch of annoying questions.”

  Alex sighed. “Don’t remind me. Now get in there and do your job.”

  I managed to shimmy through the opening feet first and lower myself without much problem. I tried not to think about what I stepped in, not that it mattered. I was covered head to toe in pig crap. The ledge was much narrower than it had looked from above. I barely had enough room to crouch and still keep my balance. Alex shoved her hand through the hole, but my body blocked most of the light and a view of everything I did.

  “Are you about done?” Alex said. “I want to get out of here.”

  “One moment, princess. There are thousands of bats above your arm so don’t make any noise or move around too much. I heard light really freaks them out.”

  Everything went dark, and I snorted out a laugh. “I am kidding. There are no bats. Can I please have the light back?”

  The darkness remained, and I started to worry that Alex may have followed through on her threat to sprint out the door.

  “That is not funny.” A small flicker grew in the cavern. Alex was trying to scope out the ceiling for herself. “For a comedian, you have quite a death wish. Hurry up and collect the sample, so we can go.”

  The light grew a little more, but the yellow glow was nowhere near as bright as before.

  “Much better, thank you.” I resisted the urge to squeak out my best bat impression. Sometimes there was a fine line between hilarity and survival.

  I pulled out the sample tube and scooped a bit of what I assumed was bat poop into the little ampule. I was about to close the lid when something occurred to me. Maybe I shouldn’t be doing this. Maybe this is what Judas hired me to stop. Should I sabotage the ampule or try to stop Alex somehow? I didn’t expect to make such a decision this early in the game. If this were some sort of pivotal moment in a large chain of events, this might be my only chance to stop them. It was the proverbial question about meeting Hitler as a young boy. If you knew what he could become, but weren’t sure, would you kill him to avoid all the atrocities he may commit as an adult? Yes, this was only a poop sample, but the principal was the same.

  “What is the holdup down there?”

  My mind raced, trying to decide what to do. Should I act now and risk exposure, or was I overreacting? I could put myself in jeopardy for nothing.

  “Uh, I have a little problem down here.” I shoved the ampule into the inner pocket of my jacket. “I lost my balance and dropped the sample over the side.”

  “Amateur.” The light disappeared for a moment, then Alex’s hand popped through with another ampule. So much for hoping she only had one.

  I reached up to grab it. “Thanks.”

  “Don’t let it happen again.”

  I crouched and scrubbed the ground with my feet. If I had to give her something, maybe the dirt would pass for what she wanted. The poop looked almost identical. Hopefully, the soil wouldn’t contain what they were looking for. I scooped some of the dirt into the container and closed the lid. “All set.”

  Alex reached through the hole and tried to help me through, but I still had the ampule in my hand. My foot lost traction, and I began to fall backward. Alex clamped down on the hand that clutched to the rocks while I shoved the ampule into my pocket. As soon as my hand was free, I reached for another handhold and pulled myself through. If I slipped, I might have landed on the ledge, but the alternative was enough to make me break out in a cold sweat.

  Alex stood with her hand out the moment I emerged. “Hand it over. I don’t want any more mistakes.”

  “I’m fine, thanks.” I smiled and reached for the dummy ampule and froze. In my haste, I put them both in the same pocket.

  “What? Don’t tell me you lost the sample again.” Alex began to reach for me, so I grabbed the first ampule my fingers landed on and pulled it out.

  “Of course not. It’s right here.”

  Alex snatched the ampule out of my hand and examined it in the fire light. “Well, you weren’t perfect, but you got the job done. Nice work. Let’s get out of here. But don’t think I am going to forget that crack about the bats.”

  Alex walked back the way we came. I was pretty sure I could tell the difference between the two samples if I compared them side by side, but I had no idea how to do that. It wasn’t like I could ask Alex to hand them over and turn her back for a second. No, don’t worry, everything’s fine. I’m just making sure you got the dummy sample, that’s all. Why didn’t I throw the stupid thing over the edge? Now I had to steal the ampule back before Alex turned it in and hope I could keep the bad one out of Agency hands.

  Chapter Twelve

  I stepped out to the elevator/transport/vomit inducer and swallowed hard, willing my face to turn less green. We had made it back to the farm with time to spare and rode the hog crap express all the way back to the Agency. We skipped the locker room and headed straight toward the main corridor—homeless slicker, mismatched boots and all. Alex didn’t want to waste any time turning in our sample. She offered to do it on her own, but I still hadn’t found a way to compare the two ampules to be sure she had the right one.

  A huge metal door reminded me this place had been designed for the demons, and the humans were nothing but an afterthought. I had to use both hands and all my weight to push the behemoth open. I felt like a toddler opening the glass door in the front of a department store. Alex slipped through the door behind me, never offering to lend a hand.

  “So, what now?” I fell into step next to her and shoved my hands into the pockets of my jeans. I caught a whiff of myself as we walked and considered dropping my slicker right there in the hall. My hi
gh-tops might not be high class, but at least they were comfortable and didn’t smell like a bacon outhouse.

  “I,” Alex drew out the singular to sound like it had about seven beats. “Will take this sample down to the lab. Then I’m going up to my apartment to enjoy some peace. You are going to go home to…wherever home is for you, and to think about whether you want to come back tomorrow.”

  “Hold on.” I held out a hand. “I thought agents got a place to stay here in the Factory.”

  Alex leaned in toward me and lowered her voice, eyeing me under her manicured eyebrows. “First, these guys do not appreciate the name Disaster Factory—although I don’t know why. Watch where you say that and who you say it to, or you may be picking yourself up off the floor.”

  “Second,” Alex leaned back and resumed her usual standoffish demeanor. “I earned my place here. Just because you got that hire slip, doesn’t mean someone hands you every perk and privilege of a senior agent.”

  I nodded. “Fair enough.”

  My response must have caught her off guard. She seemed ready to say more but didn’t.

  “How about if I start earning my keep by taking that sample down to the lab so you can get a jump on the peace and quiet.”

  Alex pulled the little vial out of her pocket and looked down, considering. “I don’t think so. You dropped one already. I don’t want to start over because you splattered the second sample all over the marble floor.”

  I threw my head back and tried to look exasperated. “I apologized several times. What do you want me to do? Drop to my knees and beg? It was an accident. I sat on a two-foot ledge above a bottomless pit and everything was slippery.” It wasn’t really all that slippery, but it made the story sound more dramatic. “It’s not like I’m going to run down the hall using the sample as a football. I will treat the precious little tube like a newborn baby, I promise.”

  I cradled my arms and rocked them back and forth. Alex actually smiled. It was a nice smile when her face wasn’t full off all that murdery, pissed off anger.